What went wrong ...?

When I was little there was a nursery rhyme we used to sing called 'Orange and Lemons', basically it was:

"Oranges and lemons", say the bells of St. Clement's
"You owe me five farthings", say the bells of St. Martin's
"When will you pay me?" say the bells of Old Bailey
"When I grow rich", say the bells of Shoreditch
"When will that be?" say the bells of Stepney
"I do not know", says the great bell of Bow
Here comes a candle to light you to bed
And here comes a chopper to chop off your head!

The origins of Oranges and Lemons are not well known, but are thought to date to at least the 17th or 18th century. Given that the bells of St. Clements Eastcheap were destroyed in the Great Fire of 1666, it is likely that the rhyme predates it. Some believe that the rhyme may be a reference to the beheading of King Charles I, as all the church bells rang to mark his execution, and the final lines may refer to his head being chopped off! (And that line was my favourite when a child! Could explain a lot ...)

So why the lesson on an old English nursery rhyme? Well yesterday I visited St Clements, which is literally across the road from my office, and was a bit disappointed with it to be honest. The inside was very worn and uncared for, with mismatching chairs, temporary partitions blocking off areas of the church, rugs strewn around the floor, all a bit sad, and also a reflection on a lot of churches around the square mile - possibly down to the fact they're rarely used, a lot of them don't even open on a Sunday!

And not one orange or lemon was to be seen ...

Then I went to Leadenhall Market:

The market dates back to the fourteenth century. It is open from 07:00-late Monday to Friday, and sells fresh food; among the vendors there are cheesemongers, butchers and florists. Originally a meat, game and poultry market, it stands on what was the centre of Roman London.

The ornate roof structure, painted green, maroon and cream, and cobbled floors of the current building, designed in 1881 by Sir Horace Jones (who was also the architect of Billingsgate and Smithfield Markets), make the building a tourist attraction. It was used to represent the area of London near The Leaky Cauldron and Diagon Alley in the film 'Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone', and of course I didn't annoy everyone I was watching the film with by constantly saying "That's near my work!" everytime I saw the place. The marker is also popular among local city workers specifically from the nearby Lloyd's Building - which can be seen in the background of the top right market picture.

Leadenhall Market is another one of those 'old amongst the new' type buildings in London, as the entrance is situated between two office blocks, and round the back the Lloyds Building (Which is frankly hideous) adjoins the market. What gets me when walking round London, is seeing buildings like Leadenhall Market, St Pauls, The Tower of London, and then looking at new buildings either just built or being built and wondering "What went wrong?!" ...

However, there is a new building being built round the corner (Everything is round to corner to me...) where the front of the original building has been kept, and the new building is being built onto the existing front - how cool does that look?!

"Exactly ..."

Yesterday lunchtime I visited 'The Guild Church of Saint Mary Abchurch", which just happens to be attached to the back of the building I work in ...

A church has stood on the site since the 12th century, but was burnt down in the Great Fire of London in 1666 (Which started about 300m to the left of the church). All that remains from the original church are three pieces of the alter plate, a silver chalice made in 1581, and the church registers from 1538, along with the vaulted crypt under the present churchyard (Where we gather for our fire alarm tests!), which means the two bars adjoining the churchyard can't have tables outside as alcohol is not permitted in a churchyard! (and no, the photo wasn't taken whilst under the influence ...)

Work on rebuilding the church commenced in 1681, built to designs by Sir Christopher Wren (He also designed St Paul's Cathedral), and was completed 5 years later. Wren, at that time was experimenting with domes, and the church has one of his earlier attempts. The dome itself is an architectural marvel as it has no external thrusts, but stands on 4 plain brick walls without any need of buttresses.

Other than the removal of box pews in the 19th century, when the present low pews, choir stalls and alter rails were installed, the church has changed very little since its completion in 1686.

The church is only open to the public on a Tuesday lunchtime, so I planned my week accordingly (I really *should* get out more) to visit. There was a bloke with a folder ready to talk to visitors about the building if they wished, but as he was busy with a group of tourists I had a wander around. The first thing that struck me was how the building smelt like a church - there's always a smell I associate with churches, a musty, old books, old wood, just old really smell. I also had that 'church' feeling, which I didn't have in the last church I visited. The other thing that stuck was how non-descript the building is on the outside, compared to how it is inside. I've mentioned the dome, but unless you know it's there you'd never realise from looking at the building from the outside there was a 40 foot dome on the building!

The feller with the folder became available, and came over to have a chat .. So I mentioned how I was planning on going round all 56 churches in the square mile, the American friends I have who read this blog, and generally said nice things about the church - to which his replies all started with "Exactly ...". Still, he was a nice bloke and let me ignore the 'Private' sign leading up to the organ gallery to take pictures.

The organ was impressive (Though the 21st century fire extinguishers detract from the 16th century organ!), though I didn't feel entirely safe up there - people in the 16th century obviously weren't 6 feet tall - or quite as health and safety concious as we are now as the ledge which would stop me falling into the nave of the church came up to my knees ...

The gallery did me the opportunity to look at the dome a lot more closely though. The dome isn't lit as the light causes the already faint paint to fade. The artwork was quite amazing, especially when you consider it was painted by a parishoner, William Snow, in 1708 (He was paid £170 for his work!). The painting depicts 'the worship of heaven, with, in the centre the Divine Name in Hebrew characters surrounded rays of glory, with worshipping figures of angels and chreubs beneath' - or so the leaflet I paid 20p for tells me, and I'll have to take its word for it as the painting has seen better days ... The picture below was taken by putting my camera phone on the floor directly beneath the centre of the dome, and setting the timer ...

Still, I liked this church ...

"Where were you when you were sh$%!"

Saturday was FA Cup 4th round day, and Ipswich were away to Chelsea. Now for the benefit of my American friends, there are 4 leagues in the UK football (That's football, the game where you use your feet to kick a ball, and not the one where you wear an inordinate amount of padding and run with the ball in your hands whilst trying to avoid other people in padding trying to decapitate you), The Premiership (The top tier), the Championship (Next one down) and League 1 and League 2.

Chelsea are in the Premiership and are owned by a Russian billionaire, who has pumped 100's of millions into the club. Players "earn" between £70,000 to £100,000 a week playing for Chelsea, whereas Ipswich have recently been bought by a millionaire who has given our manager £12 million to play with (And our players "earn" upto £12,000 a week, just don't get me started on footballers wages ...).

The big problem with Chelsea is now they're owned by a billionaire, the average fan can no longer afford to goto matches. My ticket on Saturday was £24.50 - A FA Cup promotion - However for the average league game the seat I was in would cost £50! I've often been in a London cab, driven by a Chelsea supporter who no longer goes to games due to the expense ..

Which is why we spent the majority of the second half singing to the Chelsea fans "Where were you when you were sh%&!" ...

We lost 3-1, but were drawing 1-1 at haf-time after we equalised their opener. The celebrations for our goal were immense, a real hug a stranger moment! It was only when people started to make their way down to the bar before half-time (To beat the rush ...) did we realise that during our celebrations we had actually managed to move one seat to the right and the person on the end was stood in the aisle!

6000 Ipswich fans made their way to the game, and where we were stood appeared to be where the singers were congregated. Come the end of the match and after all the singing, I had developed a voice that sounded like I'd been chewing sandpaper whilsting smoking 120 cigarettes - but it was worth it.

We didn't expect to win (Though Southend, a team from League 1 had drawn with Chelsea in the previous round) but went along for the day out and the hope we might sneak something. We had our chances, and could have gone in 2-1 up at the break, but two fantastic free-kicks by Michael Ballack and Frank Lampard in the 2nd half defeated our plucky lads ...! The gulf between the billionaire owned Chelsea and the millionaire owned Ipswich was summed up quite nicely in the 2nd half when Chelsea took off Michael Ballack (A World Cup and European Championship runner-up with Germany, and twice Champions League runner-up) and replaced him with Deco (two times Champions League winner and Portugal international), whereas we took off Tommy Miller (hasn't won anything but has never missed a penalty!) and replaced him with Alan Quinn (Won an internet player of the year award in 2002 ...)!

And the worst part of the day? After being surprised how quick it was to get out of Chelsea and back to Liverpool Street (We left the ground at 5pm and were back at Liverpool St by 6pm), it took 30 minutes for McDonalds to produce my order! And I only wanted two chicken salsa wraps - not that hard is it?!

If I can last 2 whole weeks ....

Made the momentous decision today to delete my Facebook account. I've been toying with the idea for awhile, and had discussed the whole Facebook concept with a couple of friends ...
My problem was this ... I had over 160 friends on Facebook, yet actually interacted with probably 20 of those. And out of that 20 I probably only kept in daily/weekly contact with 3 or 4 ...

Facebook was good to get in contact with old friends, from school, America, or just people I've met along the way - but once you've done the initial contact bit, everything goes quiet and you and you new-found friend have become a figure in your respective friend lists (Obviously this isn't always the case, but in the majority).

The thing with deleting a Facebook account though, is you have to search the internet to find how to actually delete your account, as Facebook don't make it straight forward. They give you the option to 'de-activate' your account, but not delete ... But Google is my friend, and I found where to go to delete - but even then there's a 2 week wait for the accout to go, so Feb 8th I should be no more on Facebook ...

So .. I've sent messages to the majority of people in my friends list, giving them my e-mail, a link to here, and my mobile number - if they want to keep in touch, then it's down to them! (And if you're one of my Facebook friends and have got this far, send me a mail or at least leave a comment on the blog!)

1 down .. 55 to go ...

So today I went to 'The Guild Church of St Margaret Pattens', which appears to have a building society attached to it on one side, and an office block tacked onto the back.

Apparently, for at least nine hundred years a church dedicated to St. Margaret of Antioch has stood in what now is Eastcheap (About 5 minutes walk from my office).

The earliest known reference is to a small wooden building in the year 1067. Later this church is referred to in mediaeval records by various names such as “St Margaret Pattens” and “St. Margaret near the Tower”.

The church was destroyed in the Great Fire of London in 1666, and was rebuilt at the cost of approx. £5000 between 1684 and 1687, on the original foundations.

The church was damaged again in World War 2, and again restored in 1955-56.

However, I have no idea how the place survives in the present day.

You are greeted by signs advertising Weightwatcher classes and a yoga class when you enter, but the church itself seemed desolate.

Don't get me wrong, the interior is amazing - lots of solid wood and everything built to last - but it all looks so drab and uncared for.

The pile of hymn books illustrates my point quite nicely ...

The building felt just like, well, a building. There was none of feeling you get when to enter a church, that feeling where you automatically lower your voice and try not to make too much noise with your shoes. Where you wonder if it's disrepectful to walk around with your hands in your coat pockets, or what you're supposed to do when you walk in front of the alter. It just felt like a large, cold building with some very nice old, wooden furniture.

But there was one thing I did like ...:

What I like about London ...

Went for a walk yesterday lunchtime, as I often do, but took a few snaps on my camera-phone.

I love how in London you can go from this:

(Old dock pilings by the old Billingsgate)

To, just 300 feet or so to the left of the pilings, this:

(Some office block the other side of the old Billingsgate Fish Market)

Then there's this place, which whenever I see it reminds of the Little family house in 'Stuart Little':

I wonder how the two office blocks attached to the pub were built? Did the publician chain himself to the bar to ensure his pub wasn't knocked down?

That's what I like about this city, the old mixed into the new. The area of London where I work (Known as the 'Square Mile', because the area known as 'The City of London' is roughly a square mile ...) has 56 churches. 56 churches in one square mile ... And they're not new churches, the majority of them date from the 17th century (Yep my American buddies, we have churches older than your country ...) From my office, I can hit with a well directed tennis ball, three of them.

I've decided that over the course of 2009, I'm going to try and find and visit as many of the 56 I can, so be prepared for photos of churches, and no I really don't have anything better to do with my lunchtimes.

Why I live where I live ...

In a half-hearted response to a blog post by Andy (Look him up, he's over there to the right in my 'Buddies who blog' list), this is why I live where I live.

(And I won't mention the severe lack of bloggage from Mr Hill, especially after his blog posting complaining about the lack of bloggage from the people on his 'Blog roll' ...)

Manningtree. 80 miles or so to the north-east of London, and pretty much 20 minutes from anywhere of importance to my family. Colchester, 20 minutes in one direction, the sea, 20 minutes in another direction, Ipswich and it's marvellous football club, 20 minutes in a different direction. From my house a 2 minute walk in any direction will take you to either woods, fields, or the river - which for the girls and dog opens up all sorts of fun walks with Dad/the feller who walks me (Delete where applicable for daughter or dog).

We didn't plan on moving to Manningtree, Colchester was my limit in distance from London (And work) - but after realising that for the additional 10 minutes on a train to work we would get far more house for our money (And I get a seat on the train to work) we looked. As soon as I saw the river and boats, I was hooked and decided that this was the place Mia and I would raise our daughter (We only had one at the time).

The town itself at one point held the title of 'Smallest Town in the UK', which meant that the fields etc that I so like are unlikely to have houses built on them. The high street is so narrow that only one car can go either up or down at a time, and the buildings have lots of character and are not your common high street type shops.

There are plans to build a big Tesco in the town, which everyone is up in arms about, as the traffic will be terrible - especially when you take into account the only road to Ipswich has a level crossing on it, so you need to wait for the trains to pass - this gets busy anyway, so the additional traffic will be a nightmare. One of my friends is totally against Tesco building their new superstore in the town due to traffic etc, but I don't think has quite grasped the concept as they're all for it if Waitrose decide to build on the site! (For my US friends, Waitrose attracts a much better class of customer ...)

Anyway - the girls and I walked down to the river on Saturday (after a quick detour to the library to get out this weeks bedtime stories in Bethany's case, or whatever Jacqueline Wilson book Charlotte hasn't yet read), so we took pictures, decided which boat we would have, decided it was too cold and wet to go on the sand but it wasn't cold and wet enough not to have an ice cream ...

Why my car looks somewhat chavy ...

I'm missing one of these... (The hubcap not the wheel) so my car has 3 dirty but with hubcap tyres, and one extremely dirty but hubcap-less wheel.

We're not sure when it disappeared, or where, but it's not there. Mia did spot a hubcap lying by the side of the road yesterday whilst on the school run, which was silver and had bits cut out, so I took Jackson and a torch (I've bought Bethany a replacement torch so she no longer needs to use a lightsabre, as written about at: http://outofmeed.blogspot.com/2008/12/2008.html) and went out into the cold and rain to have a look.

Mia said the hubcap was on Cox's Hill, which is a very, very steep hill. Jackson soon started his digging his claws into the ground routine, mainly because it was raining, but the fact he was expected to walk up a dark hill with cars passing by him at great speed obviously didn't fill him with joy. I got to the top of the hill, and couldn't see any hubcap so called Mia at home ... Other side of the road apparently, at the bottom of the hill ... So down Jackson and I go, Jackson this time straining at his lead as down was the direction to go home, and that's where he wanted to be. At the bottom of the hill, we cross over and head to where Mia says the hubcap was lying ...

If anyone is missing a hubcap for a Renualt, I know where there is one - Unfortunately I have a VW.

I'm shopping, and I'm bored ...

We hit Ipswich on Saturday morning as the girls needed school shoes,, and there are sales on ...

So Mia and Charlotte did their girly shopping thing, whilst Bethany and I did our killing time thing .. After a brief visit to the music shop so I could buy guitar strings, and Bethany could admire the 'Avril Lavigne signature model' Fender telecaster (She liked the pattern on the scratchplate), we headed over to Tammy Girl where Mia and Charlie were planning on heading to next ...

Bethany and I were bored (And Charlotte joined in when she saw the fun we were having), so ...

After the fun and games in Tammy Girl, it was Ipswich v Sheff Weds ... Charlotte didn't come to the match as she had a party/sleep-over to go to (And spent most of Sunday recovering), so she missed the gentlemen on the left ...

It was minus 2 on Saturday in Ipswich, but it didn't stop this intrepid Sheffield Wednesday fan. He spent the entire match topless, though to be fair, like the giant walrus he does have some protection against the elements - and I'm sure the magical qualities of a 'beer overcoat' are also assisting.

Sunday was spent at Lakeside shopping centre, where I Bethany and I played with i-phones, whilst Mia and Charlotte shopped (Can you see a trend developing here ...). Charlotte and I were supposed to goto church in the morning, but as she didn't get to sleep until 04:30am Sunday morning at her sleep-over, we knocked that idea on the head and she slept all the way to Lakeside. (Though she did wake in a panic because her hand had gone blue, which was nothing to do with her sleeping on it for the past hour...)

The girls and I did meet up with my brother Jeff, sister-in-law Lisa, and neice Alice (Other neice Catherine wasn't there as it was 'too cold') in Ikea so we could belately hand over Christmas presents and take a nice photo of the 3 girls.

And now another fun-packed week at work begins ...

A bit of peace and quiet ...

I wrote way back in February about my regular lunchtime walks (http://outofmeed.blogspot.com/2008/02/weird-japanese-guy.html if you're interested ...) but thought I'd tell you a bit more about one of my regular lunchtime haunts, Southwark Cathedral.

The cathedral is found on the south bank of the river Thames, just to the right of London Bridge - a short 5 minute walk from my office. I like that it doesn't cost me £10 to get in, (Unlike St Pauls!) and that you can just sit and not be bothered.

Quick bit of history about the cathedral ... It has been a place of Christian worship for over 1,000 years, but a cathdral since 1905. The present building is mainly Gothic, built and rebuilt from between 1220 and 1420. William Shakespeare buried his brother, Edmund there in 1607, and the Cathedral contains a 19th century large stained glass window dedicated to William, depicting scenes from all of the plays he wrote, at the base of the which is a statue of a reclining William Shakespeare holding a quill.

And much more interestingly ... The Southwark Choir performed the 'Mr Bean' theme song, and parts of the Doctor Who episode 'The Lazarus Experiment' take place at Southwark Cathedral. (But, although the exterior appears, the interior shots were filmed at Wells Cathedral - so disappointing loads of school children when they visit Southwark Cathedral!).

My favourite bit though is the Harvard Chapel, named after the same Harvard who endowed the US university. John Harvard was born in Southwark in 1607, a butcher's son, and was baptised in St Saviour's (As the cathedral is 'properly' known) - the relevant entry, with his father's signature, is in the Cathedral register (And is on display by the chapel.)

The chapel originally the Chapel of St John the Evangelist, but its modern reconstruction was paid for with funds given by members of Harvard University. The s stained glass window was donated by a Harvard graduate, and then American Ambassador to London, Mr Choate in 1905. He was present at its official unveiling on 22 May 1905. The window depicts the baptism of Christ and the arms of Emmanuel College Cambridge, which John Harvard attended, and Harvard University.

That's the history out the way, why do I like it? I like the chapel as it's quiet. There a massive, thick, what looks like oak, door which blocks out the majority of noise from the rest of the church. I have a favourite seat on the back row right next to a wall which means I'm out of sight, and can lean against something (I have fallen asleep in there a couple of times!). After a morning in a noisy office, 30 minutes of quiet in the chapel is much needed.

Occasionally I sit in the main body of the church, and whilst having my bit of peace and quiet, watch the people lighting candles. They fall into different groups - Some would come in very forcefully and light their candle with great purpose, whilst others would sneak in and self-conciously light their candle and then sneak out again, as if they were afraid someone would notice them and question why they were there.

I often light candles there for friends and family, though freely admit I don't know if I'm doing it 'right'. By my logic, I'm doing it right as it's how I want to do it - I'll light the candle and think about whomever it's for, and that's enough for me.

Candle light is nice ... Especially when you look closely and see that the light is coming out of the darkness ... Hmm ... Germ of a song there?

Facebook is good for something ...

The picture above depresses me for two reasons ...

1. 1: I am thin and toned (If you look closely you can even see muscle definition on my oh-so-flat stomach ...)
2. 2: I miss Lorrie and Donald, the people I'm with in the photo.

(I also miss my 'Grumpy' baseball cap that I'm wearing, but that's not really important in the grand scheme of things).

So ... Lorrie and Donald. I first met them at the end of Summer 1994, when they arrived at Camp Kuratli to take positions on the winter staff, we hit it off straight away and became good friends. The following Summer Donald was the program director of the Summer program and was instrumental in getting me my 'Special Ed' position at camp - and when he got sick Lorrie and I split his job down the middle - Lorrie handling the religious and staff aspect, whilst I did the general running around and trying to take the pressure of Lorrie (I also planned the campfire program, which meant LOTS of guitarand the chances for me to live my rock star dreams ...).

Anyway, we used to all hang out and at the end of the Summer made two road trips to Lorrie's home town of Coos Bay. Donald kindly drove me over the border to California just so I could say I'd been there (We got funny looks from the border guards, but they were happy with the 'we're just humouring the English guy' explanation), and also did a detour to the one place in Oregon that I REALLY wanted to visit - I passed up the chance of visiting the museum at Wanker's Corner ...

The road trips took in some amazing scenery, plus a visit to the beach and a walk in the woods. We also hit a casino where Lorrie and I sat in the restaurant as I didn't have any ID on me to prove I was over 21!

Don was in the running to be my best man when Mia and I were married, but the logistics of getting them to the UK proved too much, but they did make it over to stay with Mia and I around 1999/2000 ... (Lorrie and I are still arguing over when it was) which meant I got to to do the whole London tourist thing over the Christmas period, including freezing on the top deck of a open-topped London tour bus. Charlotte was around 2, took to Tabitha straight away and wouldn't leave her alone the entire time they were all with us.

Lorrie has started blogging, and has proven to be a regular blogger, which means I have something to read on the train to work ... I 'talk' to her quite a bit on Facebook, and one day she'll scan the photos of the London trip ...

A walk in the woods ...

After a morning traipsing round Ipswich looking at bridesmaids dresses, I decided that the girls and I needed to take Jackson the dog for a run over the fields. Our original plan to let Jack have a run in the fields by the church was scuppered by the farmer grazing his sheep there, so we decided that we'd go for a walk in the woods instead.

Charlotte and Bethany went running off through the trees in search of what Bethany called 'The fairy house', that we discovered when walking in the woods a few months back with my Dad, however we did get distracted when we spotted horses in the distance so obviously had to go and look at them .


We eventually came to the fairy house, which to you and I would be a run-down shack in the woods, but to a 5 year old and her willing to suspend belief for the time being 10 year old sister, is certainly a house where a fairy King and Queen lived. The girls kicked leaves, and pushed things aside in search of the throne room (I did notice a broken toilet over to one side, but kept quiet ...) whilst Jackson did his best to avoid the leaves I was kicking in his direction.

We did come across a patch of bamboo that was for some reason growing in the middle of the woods - couldn't see any pandas, neither could I think why there was a patch of bamboo growing there. Perhaps there's a trade in illegal bamboo?

Something I nicked from Christi ...

Friday, January 2nd is a somewhat wasted day in the office ... Japan has a public holiday for New Year (I work for a Japanese company) so there's not a lot coming from there, and people are still on the 'finding it really hard to get motivated' effect from the Christmas/New Year break. Me, I firmly fall into the 'firhtgm' camp, so have spent the morning reading old blogs from those in my 'Buddies Who Blog' list ... And in Christi's blog I found one which I plan on ripping off ... So :

What were you doing 10 years ago?

January 1999, I was a married man of 20 months and a father of 8 months ... Mia, Charlotte, George the retreiver and I were living in our 2nd house in Tilbury, Essex - a 3 bed end of terrace house. Tilbury was (And I'm guessing still is ..) a bit of a dive, but we bought the house there because it was cheap! £46,500! Our plan was to live there for 4 years maxium and then go somewhere a bit more upmarket, and the plan worked!

The picture is a bit of a cheat, as it was taken on April 4th, 1998, the day after Charlotte was born so slightly over 10 years ago. Charlotte looks like she's down 15 rounds in the boxing ring, a traumatic birth and caesarian giving her that look. My long hair and the not-visible-in-photo ear-rings soon went as little baby hands would grab them.

The yellow polo shirt (Fila if I remember correctly!) came from Costco if anyone cares ...


5 snacks I enjoy:

1. Dark chocolate, but I try and steer clear of it ...

2. Cola Cubes (Which again I try and steer clear of ..)

3. Bombay Mix. To my US based friends it'sthe name used in the UK for a traditional Indian snack known as chiwda or chevda (चिवडा) in India, or chanachur in east India and Bengal. The English name originates from the city of Bombay, now called Mumbai (And incidentally where my Dad was born!) It consists of a variable mixture of spicy dried ingredients, which may include fried lentils, peanuts, chickpea flour noodles, corn, vegetable oil, chickpeas, flaked rice, and fried onion. This is all flavoured with salt and a blend of spices that may include coriander and mustard seed. (Wikipedia is your friend)

4. Marks and Spencers milk chocolate tea cakes (and again I try and steer clear of them).

5. Dorittos and salsa dip.

5 jobs I've had:

1. Saturday job at Gants Hill library. Absolutely hated it, especially as I used to go and see Spurs play a lot then and my library shifts always clashed with when Spurs were at home. I had to get a special permit from the council to allow me to work (As I was under 16), and could only work 4 hours every two weeks. Working in the library took away some of the magic I used to experience when I used to go there as a child, but I'm rediscovering that through my 2 daughters.

2. One Stop corner shop. Round the corner from my house, and for the late 80's and early 90's was a unique corner shop in that it wasn't owned by Asians! I loved working there, earning the princely sum of £15 per day. Trips to the cash and carry were the highlight, and I'd have competitons with Chris (The owner of the shop) over who could carry the most trays of soft drinks or beers in at one go. I worked there until I got a proper job, then handed the person over to my mate Lloyd.

3. MIS, The Salvation Army. My first proper job, working for the IT department at the Salvation Army. My Dad pulled a few strings and got me in (Or so I believe!) and I spent the next 4 years there. Hated it with a passion at first, but then as I got to understand what the buggeration I was supposed to be doing things got better. I used to work stupid hours mind ...

4. NLD Sound and Light. I moonlighted for NLD whilst working at MIS, doing the lights for fashion shows and nightclubs. When I came back from America, I'd often work for NLD to ensure I had some money ... 10 years later I'm using the skills acquired with NLD, and putting them to use at the girl's school for their school productions! The Head's husband was impressed with the lighting show I did with 3 colours and 3 buttons.

5. Camp Kuratli at Trestle Glen. The summers of 1993/94/95 were spent in Boring, Oregon (The noun, not the adjective). In 1993 I was one of 8 boys counsellors, and frankly the worst ... I had no idea what I was doing, nor did I know how to control and look after a cabin of boys aged 10 and under. At the end of the Summer I moved onto the maintenance crew and got to know Hayden, the camp caretaker (Who was from England). I made a lot of good friends there (And am still in contact with the majority) which meant when I was called in the April of '94 by Hayden to see if I wanted to go back I jumped at the chance.

In '94 I was there for 6 months, 3 before the Summer started, and then 3 for the Summer Camps. The first 3 months were great (Even if I did crash the camp truck in the picture into not one, but two basketball posts!), but the Summer was dire ... Completely different set of staff from the previous Summer, and a whole new mentality - fortunately for me I was maintenance director so could keep out of the way all Summer and avoid the program staff who had taken an instant dislike to me.

I didn't plan on going back in '95, but decided on the spur of the moment to go and as I was unsure of who would be out at camp arranged for two friends from the UK to come with me. That summer I was 'Special Ed', and had a fantastic time .. Still miss the place.

5 habits that I have:

1. I bite my nails. Every now and then I try and grow them, but then get fascinated by the white parts that grow and am forever cleaning them. I then normally get stuck on a train for ages, so end up biting them.

2. Talking to myself. If I'm alone, be it in the car or in the office out of hours, I'm forever talking to myself. First sign on madness apparently, but I find it helps me concentrate.

3. Sarcasm. I'm incapable of not using it ... And if I'm not being sarcastic, I'm joking around. I think it's my defence mechanism, as it takes a lot for me to be comfortable with people. Admittedly it does get to me when I'm expected to crack a joke or make a comment, and I'm just not in the mood.

4. ... I use ... way too much when writing.

5. Drumming on the desk. I am the Keith Moon of finger drummers, and can find a rythmn in anything. The fire alarm test at 4pm on Friday at work can lead to a major finger drumming workout.

5 places that I have lived:

1. Ilford, Essex, UK. Grew up in Gants Hill and spent the first 20 years of my life there. Valentines Park was my stomping ground, I could happily disappear over there on my bike for the day. I loved the lakes, the 'maze', and the budgie enclosure that my Mum would take me to after playschool.

2. Boring, Oregon, USA. Camp Kuratli was in the middle of nowhere, but it did have good bus routes! Clackamas shopping mall was the single break day place to go .. Or if you were adventerous (And in my case, in need of guitar strings) then you'd head for Portland (And in my case, Apple Music!). I love Portland, and would love to go back. The hours spent in Powells ("The largest book store in the world!", or so it said) reading the imported UK magazines. Walking along the river front, or just exploring the city. I will go back.

3. Church Langley, Harlow, UK. Mia and I bought our first house there, a small 2 bedroom place with garage on the other side of the street. Church Langley was a new development and was surrounded by fields leading down to a water tower andf the M11 motorway - sadly the fields now have houses on them We acquired George the retriever whilst there, and it was when walking him on a field-soon-to-be-turned-to-houses that Mia came and met us clutching a positive pregnancy test. The neighbours were arseholes though, which is why we moved.

4. Hoxton, London, UK. The parents of one of my bestest UK friends (Hi Dawnie!) were the officers in charge of Hoxton Salvation Army. The centre had two flats and as we were in between house having moved from Church Langley and waiting for Tilbury to be ready, we moved into a flat. This was Charlotte's first home, though we moved when she was about 3 weeks old. Weirdly, I worked 15 minutes walk away yet was still almost always late!

5. Manningtree, Essex, UK. Where we are now, and I love it! River 2 minutes one way, fields 2 minutes the other, London an hour by train, and Ipswich Town Football Club 20 minutes door to door!

Thanks Christi for the idea, and I bet you're all glad (I say all, but I know only Andy ever reads my blog!) that today is a really slow day at work.

Oh, and 10 years on from January 1999, this is how I am now ... The baby is a bit bigger, and has gained a sister. I'm fatter and have less hair, and sadly George is gone but we have Jackson the Lhasa Apso.

2009 - Let's RAWK!

I introduced the girls to the delights of 'Guitar Hero' on Friday (£35 in HMV for the game and guitar, bargain!). Charlotte surprised me by knowing a lot of the rock tracks on there, apparently they've been on the soundtracks of various films, whereas I only really knew 'Sunshine Of Your Love' ..

Bethany can't get the hang of the game, but then she's 5 and has enough trouble reaching the end of the fretboard, let alone pressing the coloured buttons at the right time and remembering to strum ..


Me, I rock and have just been signed up to open at the local bar (one the game I hasten to add).

New Year was celebrated by going to bed at 11pm, and not waking up until 10am! Obviously too cold for fireworks this year, as for the first time in years I wasn't woken up by any.

Plugged my new Midi keyboard into the PC yesterday and had great fun playing with the orchestra samples. I left Charlotte playing with it whilst Bethany (And her lightsabre ..) and I took the dog for a walk. When we came back I found Charlotte picking out 'Sunshine Of Your Love' on the keyboard - that's my girl.

2008 ...

Glad to see the back of this year .. Nothing more to add to that really.

Bethany and I took Jackson for his nightly walk last night, wrapped up in coats, hats, scarves, and gloves (B and I that is, Jack has fur ...). B likes to take a torch with her as we walk through an unlit field full of shadowy trees, however when we were walking Jackson on Saturday, we lost the torch .. Not a problem for Bethany though, as she soon found an alternative after visiting the pantomime with my Mum and Dad ...

So ... what to look forward to in 2009? Um ... My brother-in-law is getting married in Cyprus at the end of May, so there's a load of Mia's family (and us) heading over for that, other than that not a lot.

At the beginning of the year I wrote about how I wanted to do 3 things this year:
1. Start to live a bit more of an healthy life
2. Pick up my guitar again and write something
3. Write that childrens book I promised my 9 year old I would write, and have now promised my 4 year old

I've achieved exactly none of those things ...

The healthy thing, well I don't drink that much and don't have coffee after 9am when at work, and I now drink water instead of soft drinks - but I had Bells Palsy with in turn has screwed the nerves in my neck and right shoulder ... With the beach holiday coming up, I'd still like to shift some weight but need to get myself motivated.

The guitar ... I did buy an i-axe (A guitar with built in USB connectivity) plus the very desktop studio that was used to record the haunting Steps classic '5,6,7,8', but never actually got around to plugging one into the other ... Now I have all this recording and sampling software perhaps I'll make a go of it ...

The book ... Sorry girls, can't see it happening for awhile. Perhaps I'll write you a song instead?!

Back to reading the 500 page worth of manuals for the various bits of software I've gathered ...

Have a wonderful and prosperous New Year, and on a personal level I hope to God it's better than 2008 ...

Jigsaw - The update!

I refuse to let a 500 piece Simpsons jigsaw defeat me .. So last night I split the damn thing down the middle which meant I could get it to shape up properly. An hour later, and with the 'assistance' of Charlotte and Bethany, it was done - with Charlotte putting the last piece in (I think it was part of Skinner if anyone is interested ...).

Charlotte then produced her 300 piece 'Hannah Montana' jigsaw, but I then decided that as Charlotte and Bethany had had a long day, been to a pantomime (Which Charlotte ended up on the stage at), and were both still suffering from colds, that it was time for bed for my two little girls.

I went upto Tottenham Court Road yesterday lunchtime and bought myself one of these ... Before anyone remarks that the keyboard has shrunk, it's supposed to be like that ...

It's a midi controller for the amount of recording software I 'acquired' over Christmas - no idea how it or the software works but I'm willing to have a stab ...

One of the bits of software is loads of orchestral samples, and is quite frankly amazing. I spent a fair bit of Boxing Day playing with it, and going through the numerous instrumental samples. I did knock together a tune of sorts, but didn't record it (Nothing to do with not knowing how ...) as I follow the same adage as Lennon and McCartney did when they wrote stuff - if you can't remember it the next day then it's no good. (Which in my case if pretty much all the time ...)

Work is very quiet at the moment (Apart from the really annoying woman in the office who insists on having her phone on speaker-phone when waiting for a call to pickup .. I can hear it, and I'm wearing headphones listening to I-Tunes) so today and tomorrow will be mostly spent reading the manuals for FL Studio 8 and Miroslav Philharmonik.

Another buddy who blogs ...

Wish I could find a better picture, but hey ...

Added to the 'Buddies who blog' is Jenna.

I've known Jen since 1993 when I was a shy Englishman arriving at a Summer camp in Oregon to work as a counsellor. Jen was the assistant program director, so effectively my boss.

We hit it off over the summer and became good friends (Jen being the original "Bum girl" for 'Bryan and the BeachBums' - the summer camp band). I worked with Jen again in 1995 at camp, this time she was cook and I was 'Special Ed' (A job title that meant I did every job that summer apart from female counsellor and female lifeguard!). The picture is taken from 1995.

Jen and I kept in touch after I left camp for the final time, and Mia and I were delighted to have Jen and her husband Will over to stay - hopefully one day I'll find the photos again.

We had fun, doing the sites of London (Will at the top of St Pauls Cathedral is something I won't forget in a hurry .. Never seen someone SO scared of heights!), Jen and I drinking Starbucks whilst Will went to the bank, Will and I drinking Starbucks whilst Jen went round the Globe theatre, and then there was the day trip to Clacton ...

Crazy golf on the sea front, a visit to Clacton pier ... Charlotte loved Jenna and Will and 7 years later still talks about them.

And even though she is 6000 miles away, Jen is one of my bestest buddies - and I miss her.

So this is Christmas ... And what did I do?

So ... Christmas ...

I was given a 500 piece 'Simpsons' jigsaw as a Christmas present, so whilst Mia and the in-laws hit the Boxing Day sales I had a go at doing it.

Charlotte and Bethany did attempt to join in with my jigsaw-putting-together, but soon got bored of looking for edges and moved off to play with something else. Now the problem was I was doing my jigsaw on the dining table, and the table would be required for tea later that day so after painstakingly getting the edging all done, I had to put the jigsaw back in the box.

Last night I had another go ... 2 sodding hours spent on it, only to discover that the jigsaw hasn't been cut correctly which means that even though I have the outside done spot on, and lots of the inside - there's an issue when branching out from the middle and joining to the sides. Not impressed.

So I've decided I'm going to cut the jigsaw done the middle and instead of having a 500 piece jigsaw, I'll have 2 x 250 piece jigsaws. It's what Homer would want. (Actually he'd want a doughnut, but whatever ...)

Jackson also got a Christmas present, though I did have to disappoint Bethany by not walking him with this Christmas gear on ...

Two more buddies who blog ...

Me, Jeff Kurtz, Chad Barr

Two more 'Buddies who blog' to add ... First of all are 'Anne and Chad'Barr'. Anne and Chad I knew from Camp Kuratli when I worked out there in the mid-90's. I got in touch with Anne again via Facebook, and it's great to see what they're both (And their new son) are up to since I knew them. I still think of them as teenagers in love ...

And then there's Jeff Kurtz ... (Even though I think it's his wife who actually writes the blog). Jeff is another ex-Camp Kuratli person and worked with me in the summer of '95. Jeff and I decided that we were going to form a band called 'The Absolute', me on guitar and Jeff I'm not sure ... We got as far as the name and that was it. Anyway, Jeff was a good friend to hang out with, and a very funny guy to be around - I miss my Camp K buddies, and thanks to Facebook I've got back in touch with some of them.

Anyway .. The picture above was taken by the timer on my camera, and is of me, Jeff and Chad round the back of the Tabernacle where we had been digging a trench in the summer of 1995 (I would have been aged 22 and a 28" waist!). For some reason we decided that we would daub S, A, and T on our chests ... I can remember that my S stood for 'Strange', Jeff assures me his A was for 'Awesome' (I'll take his word on that) and Chad's T? No idea ...

And I may look skinny in the picture, but I was toned ... Sigh ...

Frankie from 'The Darkness' says ...

In the wacky world of my office, November no longer exists .. The month formerly known as November is now known as 'Movember'. Why? For charidee, why else?

Some of the fellers (And dare I say some of the girls have stopped waxing?) are growing what's known as a "mo". The idea is that for the month of Movember you don't shave your top lip, and grow a Mo a 70's porn star would be proud to display when coming round "to fix your plumbing ...".

My problem is for me it takes all month to get stubble. One of the guys in the office has the same issue so actually started two weeks early in an attempt for a level playing field. I didn't ... So my mo is weak .. It has been compared to that of Frankie, the bass player from The Darkness, but I do feel it was out of pity.

Anyway, I've grown something for charidee, my youngest daughter hates it because "It hurts ...", I have an itchy chin, and more worringly my Mo has taken a distinctive ginger hue, but it is all for charity so please feel free to donate in this time of the credit crunch to the link below:

https://www.movember.com/uk/donate/donate-details.php?action=sponsorlink®o=1478371&country=uk

All money raised will go towards the fight against Prostrate Cancer.

Thanks.

Right then ...

So, it's November 27th (Happy Thanksgiving if you're reading this in America, and no we don't celebrate it mainly due to us losing ... You only won as you had the home advantage anyway.) and I lost did a proper blog and not an apology in July, so what's been occuring?

Well ...


Charlotte has had her hair cut. May not seem that massive, but to her it's life-changing as it was cut in a salon and everything. Having to lean backwards over a sink to have her hair washed, have an inane conversation about where she's going on holiday this year, talk about whatever reality TV rubbish is currently on the TV, discuss something the hairdresser had read in that weeks 'Heat' magazine which she accepts as gospel truth .. All part of that journey to womanhood. Next year she's getting her ears pierced, my little girl is growing up.

Charlotte's Grandad Ray bought her a mobile phone when we were last down in Devon, another rite of growing up. Needless to say the credit lasted her just over a day and she's had to spend the last month with no credit, but she has a shiny pink phone that I'm forever telling her to put away (Who leaves a phone the floor at the top of the stairs?! Charlotte ...)

Other than that ... Not a lot else has happened ...

Sorry.

Sorry Andy ....

Dear Andy,

I know I whined incessentaly when you didn't add me to your 'Blog roll', and I'm really sorry that once you did I did bugger all on the bloggage front ... But now I'm back and I hope I can add to my blogs a bit more regular like, as opposed to every 4 months or so. Now I would say it's quality not quantity, but obviously we both know that isn't ever the case, but I do have loads of blog ideas - just need to find the time to write them.

If it helps, I've got a good one lined up for Feb 25th ...

Hope you can forgive me, again ...

Lots of love,

Ed

Anyway ... Andy is a good mate who through the wonders of Facebook I've got back in touch with. He's forgiven me for my little indiscretion in the mid-90's, and through him I've learnt far more than I ever need to know about wood pellet boilers, and have discussed bands of the 90's and what would happen if the International Staff Songsters and the Chemical Brothers were to meet ... (carnage .. sheer carnage ...)

And that is the blog ... Happy now?!

Hmm ... Nice shirt ...

This is Richard Wright, the new goalkeeper for Ipswich Town. Now I could tell you about how Richard played for Ipswich a few years back, and how it's taken a very long time to get him back. I could tell you about the penalty save in the play-off final. I could tell you about how he has managed to injure himself by falling out of his loft, and tripping over a 'Keep off the grass' sign. I could, but I'm not.

Instead .. What is going on with that shirt!!? I've done some research, and apparently the brightness of the shirt is psychological. An attacking forward will see the shirt in his periphial vision, and his brain automatically aim towards the brightness. If that's the case then how comes more stewards aren't hit by flying footballs during matches?!

Charlotte and I are off to Portman Road this morning to watch the 1st team train. She gets to sit with the rest of the Juinior Blues (Without me) and then meets the sweaty players after they've finished training - as we're going to watch ITFC play tomorrow with 19 of her and Bethany's friends, she'll be asking a few players to come over and say hello (We're sat by the dugouts!) and to totally improve her street cred!

Well that's buggered that up then ...

Just changed the template settings on my blog, so now everything is all over the shop ... Oh well.

I didn't even know we had a kitchen ...

Having been woken up at 4am by Bethany, who is now sleeping in my bed meaning I won't be sleeping anymore tonight, what better time to update my blog!

Sunday, July 13th ... Mia decided my bonus would be better spent on a new kitchen than on the holiday I planned for us to go on in October. So whilst I took Mia and her Mum to Ikea to buy door handles, Mia's Dad and brother ripped out the old kitchen. Then over the course of the week and numerous take-aways, it went from picture left, to picture right ...!

We've got to go back and swap some handles at Ikea, as Mia bought too many of one size and not enough of another, but apart from that it doesn't look too bad. Almost as good as a week away somewhere hot in October, but not quite ...

Other than that ... The Bells Palsy has cleared up quite nicely after nearly 2 weeks off work. I no longer smile like a pirate, but I have lost the ability to raise one eyebrow independently .. Wish I took a photo of when I could do it.

Right ... Shower, and then goto work ...

The Bells ... The Bells ....

Woke up last Thursday morning with a weird taste in my mouth, but thought nothing of it as I've been suffering from hay fever so figured it was that ... Friday morning I realised my right eye wasn't performing too well as I was unable to close it independently, so off I toddled to the toilets at work to examine my face in the mirror. Tried raising my eyebrows, left went up, right made a token effort .. Tried smiling, full works on the left, right stayed solid, and I looked like a pirate in full "Argh, me 'earties" mode.

Mentioned it to a couple of friends and updated my Facebook status, within seconds Facebook Friend Andy sent me a message suggesting I was suffering from Bells Palsy and a helpful link to the Bupa webpage on the afflication.

So ...:

• Lack of mobility in one side of the face? CHECK
• Lack of taste - CHECK
• Hearing distorted on one side - CHECK
• Eye not closing on it's own - CHECK
• Loss of feeling in lips - CHECK

Monday was the earliest I could get to the doctors, and Andy was right - Bells Palsy it is. The Doctor kindly gave me the week off work, due to my right being unable to close and computers being bad for non-closing eyes .. (Yes I know I'm using one now - but I only use it for 20 minutes a day as opposed to 8 hours plus at work).

So this week, I have been mostly winking at people then having to explain that I'm not coming onto them but infact I'm unable to blink, have to request a straw when ordering a drink otherwise it goes everywhere, cut my food into small pieces so I can eat without a bib, and wearing sunglasses pretty much constantly to help my poorly eye. Only another 3 weeks or so to go ...

Want to see what I look like with Bells ...? You may want to ensure small children aren't in the vicinity of the computer screen before scrolling down:


I warned you .... This is a demonstration of 'The Pirate Look'.

On the plus side, I can now raise my left eyebrow by itself, always wanted to do that. (But I did discover today I can no longer whistle!)